How Online Dating Changed My Life Part One: Adventures of the Heart

Online dating changed my life.  And I don’t just mean that I found Prince Charming and rode off into the sunset on the back of his white steed while his shining armor glinted in the setting sun’s rays.  The Beau is an awesome guy, and yes having him in my life has definitely changed a lot of things, but even more than that, online dating has changed who I am as a person.

UntitledWhen I started online dating, I had many people fooled into believe that I was adventurous and open to new things.  To an extent it was true.  I love traveling and I could probably give Andrew Zimmern a run for his money on eating weird food.  I’ve been spelunking, zip-lining, elephant riding, and experienced Chinese cupping.  But when it came to adventures of the heart, I was a “fraidy cat.”

Before online dating, I’d dated a handful of guys from different walks of life.  I had two relationships that I had considered “serious,” but who knows what those guys considered them.  I dated nice guys and not so nice guys, but every single one of them was “easy.”  I don’t mean sexually easy; I mean I very rarely put myself out there to risk having my heart broken.  Dating them was easy because there was no risk.

My “first love” broke my heart into a million pieces, tossed them into a blender, hit puree, and made himself a Deviant Heart Smoothie.  (I’m not overly dramatic, am I?)  After that, I started dating guys that I didn’t even like that much, just to avoid having my heart broken.  And then I wondered why my relationships didn’t work out.

Untitled 3My experiences in online dating showed me that I absolutely could not keep doing this.  Dating guys I wasn’t even all that attracted to was a waste of my time and theirs.  Not to mention it was entirely unfair to both of us.

I was going to have to do the unthinkable and just put myself out there.  If I got hurt, then I got hurt.  If not, well, we’re all hoping for that “if not” in love, right?

When I started online dating, I dated a lot of guys really quickly.  It was amazing to me exactly how many men were available to me.  There were a ton of guys that I wasn’t really interested in, but there were also some that I actually liked.  Some guys actually gave me that fluttery feeling in my tummy.

At first I avoided those guys.  I didn’t want a guy that I barely knew to be able to hurt me.  So I went out with a lot of guys that didn’t really impress me.  And sure, the free food was nice, but I quickly realized that something was missing.  I wasn’t really enjoying myself.  I wasn’t happy with these “easy” guys.

Untitled 2Online dating taught me that I had to let go and just take a chance.  If I never took the chance, if I just dated “easy,” then I was never going to be really happy.  I would never find the one person that I would truly be myself with.  So I sucked it up and started going out with guys that I was actually interested in.

A couple crashed and burned, as is expected.  But one guy that I took a chance on; one guy that I actually really liked; one guy who gave me that fluttery butterfly feeling in my stomach; well, he took a chance on me and is still giving me that fluttery feeling in my stomach.  You can’t even imagine how happy I am that I sent that nerdy IT guy a message.

So thankful
So happy

7 thoughts on “How Online Dating Changed My Life Part One: Adventures of the Heart

  1. datingflops

    I know how you felt. I think I found the one that gives me butterflies but we still haven’t met face to face yet, so who knows. Thanks for sharing!


  2. Pingback: How Online Dating Changed My Life Part Two: What I Look For | Online Dating of a Sexual Deviant

  3. Pingback: How Online Dating Changed My Life Part Four: Summing it Up | Online Dating of a Sexual Deviant

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