I’ve heard that when women want something, they withhold sex from their partners. “You didn’t get me sparkly things for Valentines Day, so I’m not sleeping with you until you make it up to me.”
Well, for obvious reasons that won’t really work for me. “I’m withholding sex until you buy me a puppy!” “Babe, you can’t withhold sex if we’re not even having sex.” “Oh yeah…. Right.”
So instead I’ve figured out something better. Something that only works because it turns out I’m dating an über nerd. (Seriously. The other night my dad called and I got to sit in silence on speaker phone for 30 minutes while the two of them discussed in depth Star Trek Enterprise.)
So instead of withholding sex, I offer up games of Magic: The Gathering.
You see, The Beau is a gamer. He plays Magic with his friends every week. He has cards upon cards upon cards. It’s a passion I will never understand. I suppose it could be worse…. He could club baby seals with his friends every week.
Once I stupidly agreed to let him teach me. I wanted to show an interest in things he likes and be a supportive girlfriend.
By the end of the game, I was actually throwing things. It was terrible. I hated it. Now I do everything in my power to not play. In fact, I’m writing this at the table where he and his friends are playing RIGHT NOW. (My eyes may have glazed over.)
I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s really not that bad. It’s just not my thing. I’d rather be playing Candy Land.
Now, however, our conversations go like this, “Baby, if you wash the dishes, I’ll play a game of Magic with you.” “Yeah? Well then I’ll tap your lands aaaaaaaall night long.”