First First Date


Well, let me just start by saying that didn’t go as planned. But have no fear, it wasn’t terrible!

We were supposed to get sushi for dinner after work on Friday.  Unfortunately, I had to deal with some unexpected issues which added an interesting dynamic to the date.

Basically here’s what happened.  I just moved into a brand new, beautiful apartment that I forked over my left arm, right leg, and first born child (they don’t know that I might not have kids, so take THAT leasing office!  Mwahahaha).  The apartment is beautiful and pristine and recently renovated with gleaming countertops and brand new appliances.  So I’m sure you can imagine my shock when what I thought was a small scuff on the wall of the dining room started GROWING.  Yeah, you guessed it: mold.  As soon as I realized this, I immediately lodged a complaint, and in turn, they immediately sent someone out.  This was Friday after work, so I had a few hours to fit in the repair man before dinner.

I couldn’t have been more wrong.  Not only did they plan to replace the drywall, they also had to rip up the carpet, remove the carpet padding, and flush out my  neighbor’s air conditioner (thanks, neighbors!  You don’t even know me and you’re trying to kill me with your moldy AC!)

Anyway, the first repair man told me that they were going to call the carpet guy and that he would arrive sometime between now and 8 pm and that I needed to be home for it.  So I was like, “Well, there goes my date for the second week in a row….”  I sent my date a message telling him what was what and giving him three options.  One, we could postpone (another Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody…).  Two, I could leave keys in the leasing office (and return to find all my furniture missing… oh wait, I don’t have furniture yet anyway).  Three, we could pick up sushi and eat it sitting on the floor of my living room because I have no furniture (because it’s totally safe to invite a strange man you met online into your home).

He went for option three, so that I wouldn’t have to have a strange man in my apartment when I wasn’t there.  I countered that having a strange man in my apartment while I WAS there, might be the more dangerous option.  I then asked him if he’d ever killed and/or pillaged a sweet and innocent young lady before.  I also asked if he was wanted in any of the 48 contiguous states and Hawaii (I figure that if you’re wanted in Alaska and manage to escape, since most of the state is the arctic tundra you should really get props and not jail time).  Luckily for me, he said no to both questions, and I disclosed my address.

When he got there, I ran out to meet him and he drove us to get some sushi from a restaurant he had found online (since I still don’t know the area and he’s from about 25 miles away).  He had a very nice car that still smelled new and was a very responsible driver.  He paid for the sushi, even though I offered since he’d driven so far (gosh, sushi is expensive!)  We stopped at the grocers on the way home to pick up something to drink and some ice cream and this time I insisted on paying (mostly by snatching everything out of his hands and running to the cash register… smooth, I know).  Then we took it all back to my place and I had a slight inner panic attack when the time came to let a total and complete stranger into my house.

Online-Dating-GIFI opened the door, the whole time praying he wouldn’t really turn out to be some kind of serial rapist murderer (thanks to my best friend for telling me 15 minutes before he arrived that she knew a girl who had gotten killed meeting up with a man on one of these new fangled dating apps).  I may have told him I had a rape whistle in case he turned out to be a criminal or something.  He laughed.  It was a normal laugh and not a “I’m a creepy rapist murder” kind of laugh, so I felt better and let him in.

Over the next three hours, we sat in the floor (I really didn’t have any furniture) and chatted.  The carpet guy never came (of course).  But my date didn’t really seem to mind.  The conversation was good, no awkward silences (silence usually isn’t my problem when I’m nervous).  He seemed like a really nice guy.  Around 10:30 I made him leave because I was falling asleep.

I walked him out to his car, and that’s when things really did get awkward.  I’m not really sure, but I think he might have gone in for a kiss, and I DEFINITELY went in for a hug.  It was an awkward hug.  But it was my first first date with a guy I met online and I wasn’t ready to start kissing strangers.

giphy-7-1425492252On top of that, I didn’t feel a spark.  He was a super nice guy, and quite the gentleman, but no spark.  Maybe the spark isn’t a real thing, anyway.  Maybe I was too nervous to feel a spark.  I don’t really believe in love at first sight, I’m more of a believer in lust at first sight.  And while he was cute, he was no George Clooney.

I guess I would be open for a second date, if he asks.  Just to see, you know?  I guess the next step is to just wait for what happens.  All in all, I would consider it a success despite my awkwardness.  Hopefully that will get better with time!

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