Yesterday I received my first “dick pic” as pop culture terms them. I find this term kind of icky (but that’s probably because I’m an uptight prude and the word dick is not attractive to me). I wasn’t entirely sure how I was supposed to respond. I mean, seriously, what is the proper response to an inappropriate picture?
I’m thinking “My, that’s a formidable penis you have there!” probably just isn’t what he’s expecting.
I thought about going with “After studying this picture for a few minutes, I finally figured out what that’s supposed to be…. you might want to see a doctor about that….”
There’s always the timeless “HAHAHAHAHA. Yeaaaaah…. I’ve seen better.” And that’s what he gets for 1) sending me that in the first place and 2) fishing for compliments with an inadequate rod.
I’m just saying, the male body is really not a beautiful piece of artwork. The nude female figure is beautiful in its mysteries, but the nude male figure just puts it all out there. It’s like “Hey, look at my junk just dangling on display for you!” It’s just awkward (and I’m talking strictly from the art class perspective, but that’s probably why I didn’t get an A in art class…)
And if he thinks that sending me a picture means that I’m going to send him one back, he’s got something else coming. Naked pictures are probably the worst idea ever. Once you send them, you can’t ever get those back. They’re just out there, biding their time before coming back to bite you in the butt (see the countless examples of celebrities who stupidly send naked pictures). Although, if I sent him a naked picture of my wobbly bits, it would probably scare him away and deter him from sending inappropriate pictures of his dangly bits to any other unsuspecting women.
Anyway, if anyone has any ideas as to what a good response would be, please let me know!